It was dark outside when Donald answere the door. She had said she would be there at 6 o clock but now it was more like 9.00. She was an artist and asked if she could photograph the two of them in womens clothes

For a moment he thought she might be getting off on this somehow. But she didn't seem quite as psychotic as most of the people he'd met latelty so he put on a dress and cleaned the kitchen floor.

Donald made a living nowadays as a naked cleaner

.............

She spent days trailing around after him, collecting video footage for her net site and listening to stories about the time Shiela Tequilla and he had "been too much for Naples".

The pantomime developed loosely around the tale of Cinderella. Donald was Donald, the Prince was a sleazy geezer, the Sista a dominatrix and Buttons a bitchy gossip

It all went well until the night of the performance, when, after drinking the free vodka, Donald invited a man to his hotel and got lucky

She got pissed and fell over the bouncer in the hotel lobby

and the hotel fire alarm went off at 5.00am in the morning. They all looked dog rough, except for Donald who had matching blue cotton Pyjamas.

They never found out "who done it" but they never looked back